Yesterday was chemo number 5; only 1 more to go WOO-WOO! HALLEUIAH!! I cannot wait until I am done with this part of my life, it has been a rough road to hoe; one I never want to repeat!
Chemotherapy is necessary to treat certain cancers, such as mine with the personality of HER2NEU+; it increases your odds of living longer because it is usually sucessful in wiping out the cancer cells that may not have been removed during surgery. So even though I absolutely loathe chemotherapy, I know it is necessary. It sort of like your mother saying “I told you so” “Didn’t I tell you I was right” type of evil x 10. HAHAHAHAHA So knowing it doesn’t do my body and heart any better, I just know better 
I am goofy this morning, but the morning after chemo I usually am, the only thing I notice so far is how incredibly tired I am, it is now 7:21 am and I’ve already laid down once this morning. Ding dong, chemo is not nice.
Yesterday during chemo I slept almost the whole time but before I passed out I was talking to another lady there and she asked me, “since you started this [chemo] has it been making you think a lot?” Her eyes looked as sad as mine…
I knew exactly what she was asking, and I looked straight at her and told her yes it was, it was making me think too much, and not all of it good, but I am trying, then we both sighed… We tried to talk more afterwards, but we both got lost in our thoughts, then we fell asleep. When I woke she was already gone and I wish I could have talked to her some more. Women are so incredibly strong and full of courage, it makes my heart strong seeing other women who are going through this with such dignity… it almost makes me cry thinking what we are having to endure to gain this strength…
I’m not going to work today, I’m too tired and my throat hurts, I hope, I hope, I am not getting another dang flu bug, hopefully by staying home, resting, and taking Emergen-C, I’ll nip this in the bud so that when days 3-6 hit, my hard days, I’m not having to fight the flu as well as the chemo side effects…
As I continue to put one foot in front of the other…
1 response so far ↓
aklaura // January 30, 2008 at 10:16 pm |
Update: I ended up missing 3 days of work and working at home, I was so incredibly exhausted!